Wednesday, 12 June 2013
i was in a very sterile and dry dressing room of the music venue where i was about to play. It looked like a room in a mormon church... carpeted with this brownish orange kind of carpet with painted brick walls and an intercom in the room. It was very warm and still.... dehydrating.. boring and depressing. No couch. I was in that holding pattern in the hours between soundcheck and the show. Feeling at a losse end I decided to get in my car and look for some food. I don't know what city i was in and i'm sure i didn't know the city well because i was getting caught on all of these one way streets. I wasn't finding the restaurant i wanted either and i was getting frustrated. While stuck on this one way system, i passed by a clothing store that looked tempting and I wanted to go in. I stopped the car and parked up. As i was getting out of my car i looked at my watch to find that it was getting nearer to showtime and i was pushing it to get back in time to comfortably prepare. I saw this dress in the window though and the temptation was too strong... so i went in. I got lost in shopping. Everytime i felt the tug of showtime I ignored it and kept shopping . It was properly stressful. I don't know why i did that. I didn't go back to the venue. I didn't play the show. I found myself next in my fathers closet where all if his clothes were hanging. I didn't recognise the room i was in ... just the suits sweaters and shoes. The closet was wooden and well crafted and there was stone and the lighting was gentle and warm. This was a large walk in closet . I approached the mirror. A garment hanging to my left caught my eye. It was a womans' blouse. I had never seen it before but i knew instinctively that it once belonged to my mother. It was a grey sort of purple silk and looked vintage chinese. It was cut off around the bottom and was left unhemmed . I sorted further into the rack of garments to see if i could more. There were several more vintage tops that belonged to my mom. One was particularly beautiful and i became immediately attached to it. I pulled out my cell phone to call my dad and ask him if i could have it. I didn't have reception in there so i had to leave the closet to get a signal. As soon as i started to venture i failed to recognise my surroundings. I began to doubt that would be able to find my way back to my dads closet. Still trying to make the call i started up a hill. I was on the outskirts now. It was night and quite cool fresh and wet out. The mist was hanging in the grass. I was walking up a dirt path. Atlast i was able to place the call. My Fathers voice at the other end answered by saying .. "It was my birthday"... and repeated..." you missed my birthday" and again and again... thats all he was saying. It was hard to squeeze in the query about my mothers garments. I don't know why i was trying. My Fathers voice again shaping the words "my birthday". Suddenly a large white Jack Rabbit came into the view of my left eye. The rabbit crossed my path and found itself in a shaft of light that stopped it in its tracks. Just as the It came to a standstill... Its rear end split open , a big gash, and all of its entrails came spilling out like a mystery blend of meats and maggots being churned out of a meat grinder ... and then its urine...and then its blood. The poor rabbit looked so sad... so exposed....defiled...
abandoned... alone... and confused... not to mention in pain. His fur was stained pink from the blood infused urine. My eyes fixed on the rabbit. I dropped my phone as my heart sank and my fathers voice echoed "my birthday... my birthday...my birthday...my birthday..my birthday...................... .............................. .............................. ."
Friday, 7 June 2013
I found myself on a hill looking over a small village. It was dusk. The sky was lit up with every shade of purple pink and tangerine ! Beyond the village was the sea. The sun was setting into that sea. As it seemed from where i was standing, an enormous blanket of fog was unfolding from beyond the sun. It swaddled the sinking sun as it passed muting the light and bringing in early darkness. The earth cooled and a cold breeze picked up. The suns absence gave the moon a chance to shine which revealed itself in my shadow casting long in front of me as i faced the sea. I set my gaze on the crawling fog as it covered softly the village houses and the clock tower. As the fog reached the foot of the hill that held my path, it reached out two of it's arms and stretched them up the hill toward me. I watched in wonder as they climbed. My shadow seemed to become darker, more dense and defined. I saw then, the arms of my shadow reach upwards and extend themselves toward the outstretched hands of the fog as though they were calling to each other. I had to look down at my own hands to see if they had prompted this motion and created this shape. But no, My hands were in my pockets. My eyes widened and my pulse quickened. What was happening ? The cold air swept over my face and reddened my cheeks. My nose began to run. Steady on, the fog stretched its arms upward to those of my shadow. Just as the two came into contact the hands of the fog became defined as strong wielding hands... as though they were the hands of a God. These intricate and incredible instruments took hold of my shadows hands. Upon contact, my shadow turned to black water but retained its shape and held fast to the fog. In an Instant the vast blanket that stretched from my watery arms to the endless lengths of the sea DROPPED !! !!! SPLAAAASH !!!!! SWWWAAAAAAAMP !!!!!! The fog, no longer a blanket of pearly mist but a massive, heavy sheet of water collapsed and flooded the valley!!! As this happened the arms of the shifting fog held fast to my shadow and my shadow held fast to me and they yanked me swiftly down the hill by my feet and into the village waters !!!!! I was swept down the village streets past the post office and the corner store. I tried to hold on to a fire hydrant. At last I gave in to the flow. Soon enough the current slowed. Every house in the village was lit up. Families were sitting around the dinner tables... doing the dishes.. .children were jumping on beds. Everyone was carrying on as though nothing had transpired. The interiors of the houses were untouched by the water. I looked into every home to see what they were doing. I swam through the iron gates of the church and through the grave yard. I swam over tombstones and flowers and felt the rough iron bars on the graveyard gates as i left. I was the only one out in the flood. I heard the bell tower chime 7 times and mused at the way the water had transformed the sound. I then realised i was breathing... water in ...and water out of my lungs. This is always a good sign. I took it in slow.. I took it in deep. I held it in and let it out and with reverence. I felt warm. I felt safe. I felt at peace, happy and present as i held to the short hand of the tall village clock and watched over the Village Unaware.